There's a flip side though. I crave adventure. I love to explore new places and get out into the sunshine to enjoy the fresh air. Being home for too many weekends in a row makes me cranky! For 10 years now this gypsy has lived with a homebody.
|Dar at home with his fellow homebodies.
1. First and foremost, you should know that being a homebody doesn't make you lazy. Dar has a very stressful job where he works his ass off for 50+ hours a week. Not to mention the work he does around our home. The downside to that is that when the weekend rolls around, more often than not, he wants to avoid people at all costs which means staying home.
2, You should also know that your man will tag along when it's really important to you. With that said, pick and chose carefully and don't pull the "it's really important to me" card unless it is in fact really important to you.
3. This one is crucial!. You've got to give your homebody ample notice when there's an event/outing you want them to attend. When Dar and I have plans (really it's me with the plans telling him that it's really important to me that he be there) I make sure to let him know about them a month or so in advance. Then, between the time I tell him and the actual event, I'll remind him weekly so that he doesn't feel thrown off guard when the event actually rolls around.
4. It's also important to make the outing as easy as possible on your homebody. Have the address for your destination plugged into the GPS. If it's a night out where there's drinking involved, take a cab or get a hotel room so that there are no worries about over doing it. A plan in place will help your homebody feel like the "situation" is under control. Most homebodies are homebodies because they feel safe and in control at home. Try to replicate that feeling as much as possible while your out.
5. It's ok to go it alone. Early in our relationship if Dar wanted to stay home, I'd stay home too. I worried about what people would say or think if I showed up to an event without him. "Oh god, they must be having marital problems" "He's never here with her" etc. etc.. I missed events that I really wanted to attend which left me feeling annoyed with Darren. Ultimately I ended up mad at myself because I mean, how stupid. Anyways, years later I now have no problem hoping in the car and flying solo. In the end it saves us both a lot of grief.
6. Like with everything else in life, balance is key. At this point in our marriage we're in a pretty good groove and we both understand what the other needs to be happy. I'm more than ok staying home with my homebody a couple weekends out of the month but the rest of the time I need to be doing something. Whether it's a breakfast out, a walk on the beach or a night away, I've got to make it happen so that I feel like I'm fully living life.
Are you a homebody? Is your partner? What tips do you have to share about being/living with a homebody?