Wednesday, February 26, 2014

Blacklisted

On Saturday, I attended my first ever blogger event, the OC Blogger Brunch.  I made the hour and a half drive to Santa Ana to spend time with Melyssa from the Nectar Collective and 20+ other bloggers, all of which I had never met.  The event was a part of the Bloggers Give Back initiative, which is absolutely awesome concept.  The gist, as bloggers we have a voice, people come here everyday to hear what we have to say.  Bloggers Giving Back is a way for us to use that voice for something good.  I'm not going to recap the event and share pictures of the food and the decorations like a typical recap would.  Justine at Fail Sweetly did a killer job though, so for more details, hop on over to her blog.  I'm going to confess my thoughts on the event..  This may very well get me blacklisted from future events, but such is life.

First confession, I had unrealisticley high expectations.  I haven't had a real good girlfriend in a long time now, all fear aside, I was hoping to meet my new best friend.  I lost my best friend to drugs and have been flying solo for three years now.  Life without a best girl friend kind of stinks.

Two days before the brunch our hostess sent an e-mail with links to the blogs of all the bloggers who would be attending.  Brilliant!  This was awesome, but with the exception of 1 other blogger, I had never read any of their blogs.  I think having been a reader of a few other blogs would have greatly helped me feel connected to other guests.    

Most everyone seemed to already know someone.  Some groups drove to the event together others met up in the parking lot and then walked in together.  Those people spent the day chatting it up with the people they already knew.  I mean I get it.  When I'm with a group of friends I adore or haven't seen in awhile,  I'm not worried about meeting new people either.  Just something to think about folks :)  Especially at an event like this.  Maybe it was just me, but I thought the idea was to network, make new friends, get to know new people.   

It was noticeably clique: the brides, the military wives etc.  

There were a few people I'd like to get to know better.

I want to host a blogger brunch.  On my invite list would be Mariah, Steph, Amanda, Kathy, Rachael, Kate, Miriam, Sarah and anyone else who wanted to come.  We'd drink martinis instead of mimosas, Mariah would be in charge of food.  We'd play pool and listen to Brittany.  It would be awesome.

I'll give it another go.  I'm relentless like that and it was an overall good experience.  Next time, lower expectations and more stalking of the blogs of the bloggers attending.

Have a great day friends. 


15 comments:

  1. That's kind of disappointing! I haven't ever been to a blogger social event. You are so brave for going it alone. I'm too chicken! Maybe we could go to the next one together.

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  2. I don't go to blogger events for those reasons. I feel like they might be fun? But overall it's not my thing. I don't even like networking for my real job. Not that I don't meet up with other bloggers - just one or two at a time. No giant events. And only with blogs I've stalked for awhile :)

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  3. I wish it was less cliquey :( but I'm so proud of you for having the courage to go (I would have been super nervous...I always am when I have to meet new people). Aww S...I would love to attend your bloggers brunch/happy hour :) All finger foods/app would be in order...the whole thing would be SUPER cute! I do require blue-cheese stuffed olives for my martini...if I'm expected to come :)

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  4. Oh how I can relate! That is the worst feeling, and exactly the reason why I probably wouldn't go to an event like this. I find it really hard to go up to a group of girls and introduce myself. I'm proud of you for taking that leap, that's so brave! I hope you got something out of it in the end.
    And YES to your brunch! I would totally come!!

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  5. I'm going to pretend I am the Kate :) And I totally know what you mean about the events being cliquey. Luckily, I have two other blogger friends who I am on the sidelines with- Boston doesn't seem to have a lot of military wives but has tons of fashion bloggers!

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  6. i'm the worst at networking. kudos to you for going and going alone! blogger meetups are ok but a huge group? SCARY!

    -kathy
    Vodka and Soda

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  7. I am not into big meet ups, I think they're set up to make at least a few people feel awkward/like a fail. I'm a lot better with small groups/one on one.

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  8. I love how honest you are about it. Also, kudos for stepping out! And, you don't have to live on the same coast to be friends! Pen pals is fun too!

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  9. Hi Shannon. I am sorry to hear about your experience as I had high expectations for the meeting as well. I am very awkward in social situations and I was going to a group of people where I knew no one. I felt so welcomed and acknowledged as a newbie blogger. Although I did not feel I went away with a new best friend, I still left the event filled with energy. I hope that if you do come to another event that we can meet up again and talk as I enjoyed talking to you.

    Janeane
    www.designwithj9.wordpress.com

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  10. I would be totally intimidated by that... I like your idea for one better! :)

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  11. Thanks for your honesty! I feel like a lot of the bloggers who attended have also admitted to having felt nervous before getting there. Making friends as adults can be really hard, but definitely not impossible. I hope you continue to give our blogger events a chance! It takes a lot of courage, so if you gain nothing else but that from attending then you're already so ahead of the game!

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  12. funny enough I have been considering going to a blogging conference at some point lately. I also haven't been able to find a large group of other bloggers that I converse with and would most likely go in stag like you did. Unfortunately there isn't anything events like this that are close to me in little 'ol Southern Alabama so it would have to be a big trip and expense to do it - making it all the more scary if I can't make friends or come out disappointed.

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  13. I've been to some blogger meetups in Portland and I've felt very similar to you. I felt like all the other bloggers knew one another and I didn't. It still was fun but awkward. I'm glad you went!

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  14. Shannon, my best friend passed away two years ago as well. I know what you mean when you feel that its hard to make good girl friends, especially now that we're all way past forced situations (i.e. college) where you can make five best friends in one week. I've never been to a blogger meet up and but I'm disappointed to hear that it was like that since I had always considered going. I'm living in San Diego too - we should all have our own meet up and happy hour (cliques excluded) !

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  15. Hello!
    I'm totally going to creep on you posts for the last week or so since I haven't been around.

    Firstly Shannon so proud of you for going to an event like this alone where you don't really know anyone. I can only imagine what my pre-event panic would be like in the car on the way down, heck I might have even drove half way and turned around!

    Next, super brave to BE HONEST about the event and how you felt even at the risk of 'blacklisting' though if these ladies take some time to get to know you I don't think that will happen. I think it's natural to have high expectations for something like this, you imagine how it will be etc.

    And that's very sad about your best friend :( it really is tough going when you feel you don't have someone to confide in (other than your other half etc - just not the same right??) I still have my best friend at home in NI. We facetime more regularly now maybe every 2-3 weeks, which I think we both needed.

    Though my best uni friends etc have pretty much dropped out of my life being hard to keep in touch with everyone and life tends to get in the way - both parties are at fault for this though. Plus I was so out of whack for pretty much most of 2013 and didn't really want to talk to ANYONE so that didn't help.

    But hey, I don't know why anyone wouldn't want to be your bestie! And OMW If that's not justification for me to fly to San Diego I don't know what is...I wish I could :( I could do contribute food and strawberry daquiris :)

    Hugs
    Sarah-Louise
    XO

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