Tuesday, January 28, 2014

Stress Less, Tips For Reducing Stress

We all stress.  Some of us definitely stress more than others (me) and our reasons for being stressed may vary (work, family, money, health issues etc.), but the end result looks and feels the same:  Mind racing, pounding heart, elevated blood pressure, a sense of panic.  You get where I'm going with this.

Source
Three out of five days I bet if you walked by my desk, I'd look a little something like this.  Now in my defense, I do have a stressful job.  With a high profile project coming to completion, the last few months have been particularly stressful, but like I said above, we all have reasons we could be stressed out.  The key word here is could.  Like anything else, letting stress effect you is a choice. 

For years, maybe even a decade now, I've made the choice to be stressed out (I think most of us have, for different reasons of course).  For me, so much of my self worth was based on the job that I had, that I've conditioned my mind to work overtime.  I wanted so desperately to be successful in my career, that I made an overachiever look lazy.  I pushed and I climbed and I did whatever it took to prove myself worthy in the workplace.  I've been the ideal employee, a bosses dream.  Bravo for me right?  Wrong!  The "conditioning" I put myself though may have gotten me raises and promotions in the short term, and if I'm being honest, it definitely helped me get out of a really bad situation, but in the end, where it matters most, it's left me a stressed out mess. 

One of the many reasons I'm now in weekly therapy sessions, yep weekly, you read that right, is because at 34 I need to retrain my brain.  In layman's terms, I'm learning to slow my brain down.  I'm teaching myself how to live a stressful life without being stressed out.  I've made a conscious decision that 2014 is going to be the year I learn to lose the weight of the world, and for me a big part of that means losing a mind that runs overtime trying to achieve.  In just a few short weeks, I've seen an incredible shift in my attitude and in my stress level.  In no way has the stress I'm under gone away, I'm just learning to reduce the impact it has on my mind and body.  I'm not an expert but I've picked up some super, simple tips over the last month that I'd like to share.  Full disclosure, the exercises themselves are incredibly easy, it's implementing them into your daily life that takes work.

Tip #1 Self Regulation
Ever heard of it?  Me neither until a few weeks ago.  Man, what a positive impact this exercise has had on me though.  To get started you'll need to pinpoint your first signs of stress.  It didn't take me long to realize that in stressful situations my breathing instantly gets shallow and then the speed of my movements increases.  Once I knew what to look for, I put myself on alert.  The moment I'd notice my breathing get shallow, I'd take three deep breaths.  As soon as I noticed my typing speed increase, I'd stop typing.  If I'd start to walk fast, I'd immediately slow my pace.  By consciously looking for and then correcting these behaviors, I'm regulating my level of stress and ultimately stopping what could be a slippery slope.

Tip #2 Unplug
This is huge.  I think a big part of the reason so many of us are as stressed out as we are is because were over stimulated.  I know I am.  I'm not gonna go off and get all crazy about how bad technology is because I love my ipad as much as the next person, but what I will say is that when you're feeling stressed, the added stimulation isn't helpful.  If I'm feeling stressed out and my cell phone rings or a text comes in, I don't answer it.  In the past few weeks I've changed a lot of little behaviors centering around technology that have really seemed to help,  I've stopped listening to music in the car on my way to and from work.  I've also stopped watching tv or surfing the internet at least 30 minutes before I go to bed.  I don't need the extra chatter.  I've stopped using my lunch break to blog as well.  I mean how can I expect my brain to slow down when I'm constantly stimulating it???  

Tip #3 Go Outside
It's amazing what some fresh air and a 10 minute walk can do for you.  I use to say I was too busy to step away from my desk and if I did go outside, I'd use that time to make calls or return personal e-mails.  I guess something is better than nothing, but what I mean here when I say go outside, is really go be outside.  Let the sunshine warm your face or the breeze blow your hair.  Nature has a great impact on our moods. 

Tip #4 Just Breathe

Source
I mean the simplest of all concepts.  We have to breathe to survive right?  I know I mentioned my shallow breathing above but what I didn't mention is that there are days, no joke, where I don't think I've taken a deep breath until I get into bed at 10 o'clock at night.  Lately in my therapy sessions we've been spending a good half hour just breathing/meditating (pretty much one in the same).  I'm probably the only person on the planet paying their shrink to meditate with them, but hey, it's helpful.  The practice has helped so much that I now find myself doing it while I'm doing other things (like having full on conversations).  It's amazing!    

Tip #5 Visualize


If you guys follow me on Instagram (which you should) you've already seen my new little friend.  She is a reminder to be still and to be at peace.  I've had her on my nightstand for the last week and every time I look at her I visualize myself as calm and at peace as she appears to be.  There's a reason they sell this shit you guys.  I mean we all love our mantras, maybe you have your favorite saying or a reminder to yourself on your desktop or pinned up on your bathroom mirror.  Visual reminders help to keep us moving down the right path, they work.   There may be a third tattoo on the horizon...

Well that's it for my tips and tricks for now.  Like I said, these are super simple concepts.  The hard part is making them habit.  The good news though is that it really only takes a few weeks before these practices stop feeling forced and start feeling a bit more natural.  Again, I'm not an expert and I still have a long road ahead of me but for now these things really seem to be helping me manage my stress.  I hope they help you too and I'd love to hear what you guys do to keep yourself calm and at peace in this stressful world.   


10 comments:

  1. I have been making a point lately to get up from my desk and go outside to walk around the building for fresh air. It is freezing out but still worth it and i always feel better afterwards. These are all good tips.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Good for you Kate! It's not always easy to pull away, but it's so worth it. Enjoy your weekend!

      Delete
  2. I'm with you on the work stress. I got promoted and a raise because I thought that's what I was supposed to do, and I am miserable. It wasn't worth the stress it brings everyday!! I wish I could go back to my old role, lower salary and all. Reduced salary = reduced stress.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I hear you. The more money you make, the more stressful the job. I think I'm close to being done climbing the ladder. The older I get, the more my mental well being means to me. I work to live you know. I definitely don't want my success at work to define me as much as it has.

      Delete
  3. #1 is great...I can totally see how that can help. P is good at recognizing it for me and puts a hand on my chest to make me slow my breathing if we are in a stressful situation. It is harder for me to be self-aware and correct it myself. It is wonderful you are taking these steps!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's amazing how quickly being self aware becomes a habit. After only 2 weeks of practice it's a heck of a lot easier and totally worth the effort. D had me stop and take 3 breaths today :). Our guys are great aren't they

      Delete
  4. Hi Shannon,

    Great advice, I think we all let stress creep in on us and impact our lives from time to time, myself included. I am a stresser/worrier and often it's about things beyond my control or my never ending to-do list for the next work day which riddles my mind when I'm trying to sleep.

    I am becoming very aware though of when I stress - the typing faster, the over-thinking - and trying to not let it take over. I also recently downloaded the smiling mind app on iphone which is a guided meditation app and so far I like it! And unpluging - this is one of my biggest problems I think. Just switching off and tuning out - we definitely all are too stimulated!

    P.s. "I'm probably the only person on the planet paying their shrink to meditate with them, but hey, it's helpful." You are hilarious Shannon!

    Love and hugs,

    Sarah-Louise
    Xo
    http://notlikethemoviesblog.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hello my darling. Hope all is well in Oz :). I wanted to share this guided meditation I've been listening to for the last few days, http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=k4CMNrKNtLg. I'm loving it. Definitely going to check out the app you recommended. I've been dying to read your Liebster post all week, but I've been a bit busy and wanted to give it the proper attention, so I'm popping over now. Hugs.

      Delete
  5. I'm AWFUL at unplugging. My phone is the last thing I look at before bed and the first thing I look at when I wake up in the morning. It's pathetic, really. Pete and I had a date night at home last night where we watched shows and ate together and whatnot... neither of us used computers or our phones for 2 hrs. It was... AMAZING!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Amanda, I think you guys should make that a habit :). A few hours a week, devices down! You can do it and it feels so good to be 100% present every now and again. I'm down off my soap box now. Xo

      Delete