Sunday, June 29, 2014

The School of Life, Week 8

The School of Life

Happy Sunday!  Boy am I late to the party today :)  I hope you're all enjoying an amazing weekend.  If you've got some free time, link up with Mariah, Miriam and I for some schooling.  I think this week is a good one for me.  Lots of life lessons all about relationships.  Let's get started.

1. It's so freeing to just be yourself and let people see the real you.  Sure, it's scary at first, but in the long run, it's the only way to go when forming new relationships.  I use to mold myself into who I thought I should be in this crowd or in that crowd.  God that's exhausting and ultimately unfulfilling.  We all do it though, no?  Last August (probably before any of you were here) I wrote about feeling unsatisfied with existing friendships.  Since then building real friendships has jumped to the top of my priority list and made me rethink how I go about things. 

Last night Dar and I attended a party hosted by some new friends.  This was our first time being invited into their home.  As we pulled into their neighborhood the street was lined with cars, party goers.  It's normally a bit intimidating walking into a crowd of 60 people you don't know.  That was not the case here.  Everyone was so welcoming, so open minded, so tolerant.  Dar even played Slayer on the world coolest jute box which was followed by some Snoop and then the Village People.  Such a diverse and accepting crowd.

I came home on an absolute high and in complete ah of the friendships that these new friends have built over the years.  Young, old, married, single, employed, unemployed, tall, short, all done up, in a tee shirts and jeans, wild and crazy, calm, rich, not rich.  It was so refreshing to just be me and not worry about what anyone was thinking.  That happened only because everyone else there was doing the same thing.  Lose the facade my friends. 

2. Old friendships with people who knew you before you were anything will put the biggest smile on your face.  Clearly I'm not talking about being famous, rich or powerful when I say "knew you before you were anything".  What I mean by that is, when you're in college/high school, you really know very little about yourself.  At least I didn't.  It was a carefree time.  A time where I wasn't bound by self inflicted rules.  I went wherever the wind blew me, whenever the wind blew me.  I'm not stupid though.  I know that for every morsel of wonderful that time in my life brought, it also brought complete and utter confusion, epic mistakes, and feelings of being out of control.

With all of that said, there's something about spending time with people who knew me back when that just puts a smile on my face.  It takes me back to all the good that was that time in my life.  The bad associated with that time is gone though because I'm older and wiser now.  Thirty two more days until I meet Yo in San Francisco! 

3. Sometimes you just have to duke it out.  Every once in a while things will come to blows in the Kerns house.  We'll have to get into a knock down, drag out fight to get all the ugly out before we can move forward.  Marriage isn't always easy folks.  Anyone who's ever been married will tell you that.  What I do know however is that nothing worth having in this life is easy.  Stick it out.   

And now, just a random question before I go.  Do you think it's inappropriate to wear a white dress to a wedding?  Is white reserved strictly for the bride?  What if it's the bride's second wedding?  And what about red?  Is red too much for a wedding?  I'm trying to avoid buying a new dress for the wedding D and I will be attending next week and my two best options are white and red.  Let me know your thoughts.  Until next time.  Love to all.


  1. it white, white or like white and something or off white. I might avoid wearing white...while I think most people don't care, you never know when there might be that aunt or cousin that might take offense. I think red is fine. Can't wait to hear about the wedding! Sounds like a great party!

  2. I agree with Mariah, I would stay clear of white as well. I know lately more and more bridesmaids wear white as requested by the bride, but I think for guests it's still not appropriate. Go with red! As far as I know, all other colours are free for the taking.
    And yes, yes, YES to tearing down those facades we erected around us! I've been on a mission for a while, and cut out a couple of friends in the process that were too fake for my liking. It was hard, but necessary.
    It feels wonderful just being yourself, free and unencumbered! I'm so happy you had a great time at the party, hopefully they will stay good friends for many years to come!

  3. I love the life lessons. You are right it is always better to just be yourself and be who you are. That is very hard for me as well. When I first meet people I can be very reserved and shy and it is really hard for me to open up to new people. But, as I get to know someone I feel like more of the real me gets to come out. I think white is fine. I don't think it is in anyway competing with the bride. If it is hot and the wedding is outside I would go with the white.

  4. No white dress to the wedding, sadly! Red may work but it probably depends... the party you went to sounds like a great time and you are so right - there's nothing like a good high after good friend time!

  5. SO much wisdom lady. Number one is so fresh and liberating! I think we all definitely worry too much about what others will think of us if we just be ourselves so we hide a little or a lot of ourselves as a defensive mechanism. I know I hide some crazy!

    I would love to have known younger Shannon, I bet she was all kinds of awesome! As you are :)

    "nothing worth having in this life is easy." I said something along these lines in a recent facebook status, LIFE IS TOUGH YO'. But this is very true.

    Love and hugs Miss, XOXO